Reasons why a girl should never re-read her own P0rn

P0rn written by normal people:



- witty banter

- kisses

- optional more witty banter

- various touches

- penetrarion

- penetration with optional touches & kisses

- penetration

- first pg's orgasm

- penetration

- second pg's orgasm








P0rn written by me:



- introduction

- random thoughts (possibly angsty)

- witty (?) banter

- more random thoughts (possibly flashbacks)

- more banter

- various light touches

- MORE random thoughs

- light kisses

- more light touches

- banter (yet again)

- deeper kisses

- heavier touches

- random thoughts

- nipple play

- more kisses

- more nipple play

- kisses & touches

- masturbation

- BANTER

- oral sex

- ... oh wait, I should write penetration now, right?

- "he thrusts in and out. Then he thrusts in and out again. She's warm and wet. It feels good." ... yeah, ok, that says it all, right?

- one of them orgasms (possibly the other one, too, but don't count on it)

- post-coitus banter

- random thoughts

- optional semi-related coda







.... Sometimes I picture my characters just staring at me and going "girl, stop giving me blue balls kthxbai".

Then I think about it hard.

Then I shrug, laugh and go "SHUT UP IT'S MY P0RN I DON'T EVEN WANT IT TO BE REALISTIC".