Reasons why a girl should never re-read her own P0rn

[sigyn_halja]

P0rn written by normal people:



- witty banter

- kisses

- optional more witty banter

- various touches

- penetrarion

- penetration with optional touches & kisses

- penetration

- first pg's orgasm

- penetration

- second pg's orgasm








P0rn written by me:



- introduction

- random thoughts (possibly angsty)

- witty (?) banter

- more random thoughts (possibly flashbacks)

- more banter

- various light touches

- MORE random thoughs

- light kisses

- more light touches

- banter (yet again)

- deeper kisses

- heavier touches

- random thoughts

- nipple play

- more kisses

- more nipple play

- kisses & touches

- masturbation

- BANTER

- oral sex

- ... oh wait, I should write penetration now, right?

- "he thrusts in and out. Then he thrusts in and out again. She's warm and wet. It feels good." ... yeah, ok, that says it all, right?

- one of them orgasms (possibly the other one, too, but don't count on it)

- post-coitus banter

- random thoughts

- optional semi-related coda







.... Sometimes I picture my characters just staring at me and going "girl, stop giving me blue balls kthxbai".

Then I think about it hard.

Then I shrug, laugh and go "SHUT UP IT'S MY P0RN I DON'T EVEN WANT IT TO BE REALISTIC".

Comments

[geilie11.livejournal.com]

Yup, you're sort of right about that (yes, Hagen, I'm looking at you!), but it's still absolutely lovely to read, you know. Maybe it's more enjoyable because of all the bantery-angsty-introspectivish stuff - well, for me at least - so don't ever change (your style), pretty please? *w*

[sigyn-medea.livejournal.com]

Aww, thank you, dear. <3
I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be able to change even if I actually wanted to, so don't worry. XD

(Yeah, Hagen is totally one of the worst offenders. The only more "slow-build" p0rn I've written was a Loki/Hod fic for Duedicoppe last year, I think - and I'm not even sure it was angstier than the Waltharius fic. I mean, at least it had a sort of happy ending.
... You know, I have this horrible feeling I'll try to write a lot more about Hagen before the fest is over. Damnit.
Loki totally gets the cake for the banter-y stuff, though. XD)

[geilie11.livejournal.com]

I wouldn't mind if you decided to write more about Hagen before the fest is over, you know... I wouldn't mind at all. *w*
But yes, Loki DEFINITELY gets the Banter King Prize! XD

[sigyn-medea.livejournal.com]

Be careful about what you wish for ... ;)
Loki is both Banter King and Banter Queen. u.u XD

[geilie11.livejournal.com]

Loki, the Ultimate Banterer. <3